What's are your opinions on smacking?

I think if I wasn't smacked I could have turned out a lot worse than I am now

yes, it did hurt then, but I now thank my mum for I know the reasons why she did it.

What do you think?

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yes, it did hurt then, but I now thank my mum for I know the reasons why she did it.

Haro ni ya muka uri ihii!

spanking if properly administered i believe its okay, but only after you have made the kid realize/see their mistake so even when you are doing it, they know they deserve it after what they did. i think its only wrong when overly done, it makes kids rebellious rather than repentant. i also believe one should spank after they have cooled off first not in the heat of the moment when you are likely to exaggerate and even hurt the child only to regret later....
i believe in dialogue so much but i also spank when need arises...

Good people,

Spare the rod and ........

I highly suspect that if some of us were not given a good and thorough beating, things could be a lot worse. I liked playing truant when i was young and almost dropped out of school in Standard 6c just like Matheri.
I will discipline my kids thoroughly, not because i dont understand this human right gibberish, but because i love them and i desire the very best for them in future.

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spanking if properly administered i believe its okay, but only after you have made the kid realize/see their mistake so even when you are doing it, they know they deserve it after what they did. i think its only wrong when overly done, it makes kids rebellious rather than repentant. i also believe one should spank after they have cooled off first not in the heat of the moment when you are likely to exaggerate and even hurt the child only to regret later....
i believe in dialogue so much but i also spank when need arises...

Teaching children from a young age by setting limits and explaining reasons for these limits helps
to instill self-discipline. Smacking, which controls your child from the outside, has no long-lasting positive effect. In fact smacking usually has to increase in severity in order to have the same impact on your growing child. This is where the thin line between smacking and hitting can be crossed.



Haro ni ya muka uri ihii!

I agree with you all, there's a very thin line between smacking and hitting. My almost 3 year old girl is notorious in testing how far she can get away with anything, if she says no she will definitely not do it unless she's punished.

Sometimes am at my wit's end and the only result is only smacking.

I have recently discovered that distrating her from stuff she doesn't want to do for a moment and then going back to them normaly works coz I guess she forgets she didn't want to do them in the first place.

Any more advice is most welcome.

communication is very important and though at some age kids still dont fully understand certain things and the extents, its good to do it anyways and hope they understand with time. a little spanking does alot of good especiallly for kids who like having things their ways or no ways at all. say for example a kid throwing tanttrums? this really gets to me!! and smacking works well for me, but kids are different what might work with my baby might backfire on yours if you know what i mean. but i think pointing out mistakes immediately you notice them also helps to make them know what is wrong and what is right so that when they make a mistake they know is wrong, they feel as in they have a conscience telling them its bad and they even know they could be punished for it...

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Any more advice is most welcome.

Every parent experiences frustration with his or her child at various times. It is at these times that a parent may smack in the heat of the moment, but this is an outlet for the parent’s frustration, rather than a helpful way of influencing the child’s behaviour.



Haro ni ya muka uri ihii!

Forbidden for the last 30 or 40 years in Sweden. Happy for that. I don't think violence help.
We where born with a mouth. And a brain. Works pretty well for communication purposes.

@Nini - Do you have kids? I doubt you do, if you did then you wouldn't be saying this.

Smacking for me is not fun, it only occurs when all other methods have been exhausted, am sure the same applies to other parents.

Kids will always press all of your buttons so as to judge what they can get away with. My little one for example knows she can get away with murder when it comes to her mum, as she does not believe in smacking, she knows there are no consequences with her mum.

Kids don't always know what they're being told is for their own good, if I was to tell my daughter "give me that knife as you risk falling with it and stabbing yourself", she will do so without argument. On the other hand if her mother tells her so, she will think it's a joke and start running with it, who do you blame in this case?

... as it's already been said, spare the rod and spoil the child.

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as it's already been said, spare the rod and spoil the child.

i say amen to that!! you have to be a parent to really know that for sure!! and i agree as well that smacking is usually the last resort when oher methods have failed.
as for your baby Karungaru, am sure she will understand most of these discipline stuff as she grows up, i think she is still too small to understand somethings yet. bubt if one of you is smacking, then its okay if the other one doesent, it is so bad when you have both parents who smack, kids feel like the whole world is against them (never mind the fact that they are the ones on the wrong to begin with!)

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Originally posted by wa kariuki:

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as it's already been said, spare the rod and spoil the child.

i say amen to that!! you have to be a parent to really know that for sure!! and i agree as well that smacking is usually the last resort when oher methods have failed.
as for your baby Karungaru, am sure she will understand most of these discipline stuff as she grows up, i think she is still too small to understand somethings yet. bubt if one of you is smacking, then its okay if the other one doesent, it is so bad when you have both parents who smack, kids feel like the whole world is against them (never mind the fact that they are the ones on the wrong to begin with!)

Well i have a few pointers here. Kids understand discpline issues better when they are a little older. However; there's a reason why God said spare the rod and spoil the child. In a case Karungaru's daughter....thorough spanking might not necessarily help because probably she's too young to understnad why she's being spanked so hard...but a litle spanking will sure do the trick...its called to "condition" a kid. If for example she does something wrong and you spank ..ofcousrse with caution...she will get to learn with time...that Mum/Dad doesnt apprecaite that kind of behaviour. In addtion to one parent being the discplinarian and the other one takes a back seat...that will only make divisions in the house. As parents you should always be unified infront of the kids and decisions concerning their dispciline should be unanimous. Parents who have differnt disciplinary measures only confuses the kids more and the discpline instilled by one parent is not withstanding as it would when both parents are concerend.

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In addtion to one parent being the discplinarian and the other one takes a back seat...that will only make divisions in the house. As parents you should always be unified infront of the kids and decisions concerning their dispciline should be unanimous. Parents who have differnt disciplinary measures only confuses the kids more and the discpline instilled by one parent is not withstanding as it would when both parents are concerend.

i believe unity is vital and i also agree with you that both parents should discipline kids, i didnt mean that one should take a abck seat, my opiinion is they dont have to spank as in both of them, like in my family my mom used to do the spanking and my dad used to like either sitting down and talking to us (i preferred that to spanking) or punishments like being denied favors, or things you like eg, TV, visiting friends, ets. thats what i meant, if they both spank it becomes like some routine kids get used to being spanked and eventually rebel.

wa Karumba,
I understand your point of view because I'm a Kenyan who also recieved spankings in childhood. BUT, you must be very careful, I also believe that the type of punishment depends on the culture in which the child is brought up in. You live in UK I live in the US. these two places are completely different from the culture in which we were brought up in. The point of punishing a child is not to hurt her but to make her understand her mistake and not do it again. If your daughter understand that being denied computer games, for example, is a severe punishment for her, then that would be the best punishment - not spanking. Since your daughter is brought up in a different cultre, You dont wanna do something that your child will one day view as a child abuse. Just an opinion.

wa Karumba,
I gave you my opinion thinking that you live in the UK. I don't know why I thought you were living in the UK. Any way my opinion is still applicable - the type of punishment depend on the culture in which the child is brought up in.
Otherwise happy upbringing.